You read that correctly.
While traveling to Portugal recently, we saw a flyer for tantric and erotic massage. We gathered around the flyer and shared a few ooo's and ahh's thinking this might be a fun thing to do while visiting Porto. My husband contacted the company and got all the information and even inquired about solo or coupled experience possibilities.
Over the next 24 hours we discussed the possibility of us both going. While the idea was tempting, I wasn't quite in the mood for this type of experience (Porto was HOT) PLUS I started feeling like I was coming down with a cold. So, while laying down to take a nap,I asked my husband if he wanted to go solo. His sweet eyes perked up and said, "Yeah, I'd love to go!" with excitement in his voice we started to share our boundaries and what we'd both be comfortable with before agreeing he go. Then off he went to pay for an erotic massage with a happy ending.
I imagine it went something like this...
You may be asking yourself, Ok..what's the lesson here?
Learning and practicing open communication about sex is an important aspect of maintaining healthy and satisfying sexual relationships.Holding back your feelings, emotions, wants, needs, desires or boundaries isn't serving you or your sex life. I'm referring to the sex life with or without a partner. Learning to openly communicate about sex, sexuality and relational conflict is only going to bring you and a partner closer together!
Here are some steps to help you become more comfortable and effective at discussing sex openly:
Self-awareness: Before you can talk openly about sex with someone else, it's essential to understand your own thoughts, desires, and boundaries. Take some time to reflect on your own values, beliefs, and experiences related to sex.
Educate yourself: Learn about sexual health, anatomy, and the various aspects of human sexuality. The more you know, the more confident you'll be in discussing these topics.
Right time and place: Find a comfortable and private setting where both you and your partner or conversation partner can feel at ease and focus on the conversation.
Start slowly: Begin with simple and non-threatening topics related to sex. This might include discussing sexual health, consent, or personal preferences.
Establish boundaries: Discuss your boundaries and consent with your partner. This ensures that both parties are on the same page regarding what is acceptable and what is not.
Maintain open communication outside the bedroom: Foster a culture of open communication in your relationship, so discussing sex becomes more natural and less intimidating.
Schedule a session with me if needed: If you or your partner are facing challenges related to sexual communication, consider seeking help from a sex coach or therapist specializing in sexual health.
I appreciate the time you spent today reading my story and being open to suggestions on creating the sex life you desire and deserve!